Dream 10-26-11 Inner Tardis

Inner Tardis

dreamI am an adult, with (in charge of?) a group of kids – teens and younger. I have brought them to show them my grandparent’s house, on my Dad’s size. As we approach the house on foot, I see a white wood frame home, not very wide – looks like it might contain two rooms across, the same deep. I know better, but wait to show the surprise to the kids.

We enter, there are indeed two rooms welcoming us, but then I take them through a door into other rooms, and more, deeper and deeper into the house, looking all around. There is an old fashioned kitchen, and in may rooms some old fashioned furniture – but strangely, blending in, some more modern pieces, even the occasional computer screen or flat screen tv.

Original-Nintendo-64In one room, for example, there is an old style 4 poster bed, and on a small vanity table, a flat screen tv – attached to this, and already on but set to pause is a Nintendo 64. I’m surprised it will work on the new screen, pick up the game controller, and start it running. I play a couple of minutes, then put it back on pause.

It feels like people are living here, yet no one is around aside from my crowd of kids. There are signs of certain areas being kept clean, and of recent use, like the game console being on pause – yet there are also a few cobwebs in corners and signs of wear and tear on some of the furniture.

The main piece, which is a wonder to me, is a long wide rectangular room. Along the walls, or rather set forward parallel to the walls, are mini walls, slightly curved and wide – behind these are various private sitting areas, another game area or two, even a few bedrooms. It’s like each area is private, yet connected to the main room without doors for ease of access.

I am amazed at how well this works, and think to myself this is the kind of thing I’d love in an apartment – no doors, but separate private areas.

Even though I knew before entering that it would be larger inside than outside, everything is a discovery and a delight to me. In some areas I sense my Dad and my grandparents – can almost see them, but not like ghosts or anything, just that their presence is so strong. I vaguely remember exploring certain parts of this when I was little.

The kids, who have been exploring, are beginning to get a bit rowdy, so I ask the older ones (teens) to gather up the younger ones so we can leave. I stop by the room with the Nintendo in it, a sense of wistfulness, thinking that if we could live here, that would be my room.

Before we leave, I need to go to the bathroom and pee. I sit, and feel the pressure, start to release it, but realize I’m still wearing my underwear, I forgot to pull it down. Then I realize I’m actually in bed and better get up before I wet myself, so I wake up.

Comments:

Interesting difference between this house of rooms and a previous one I dreamed about recently. The previous one is one that recurs often in my dreams – and though it may vary, it is always the same “place”. This one was different. And though I knew it would be like the other place in that it would have lots more to see than meets the eye, the difference is that all of this was new to me, a new exploration, not discovering old territory, but finding new marvels.

Yet there was a link to family history in this one – on my father’s side. Whereas the previous dream of hidden rooms was for my Mother’s side of the family. Interesting …

The Nintendo has a lot of memory associated with it – i bought one for my older daughter when she was 8, and learned to play it with her – we spent many hours of fun on it, and I played a certain number of games (anime RPG) in parallel, when she was in school, for example. I’ve loved games since then and eventually went from console to computer, but those early console games always remind me of a simpler time in my life, when we were a family unit, and happy. I didn’t get that association in this dream, just wanted to mention it.

In this particular dream, it was more a feeling of being drawn to play the game, of a distraction and a pull toward simpler times, something familiar in this new/old place. The room it was in felt like a kind of “safe place” where i could just play and relax, no worries.

But in the dream there were also many kids that were my responsibility, kids of all ages. It was like I was their social worker – which ties in with a tv series I was watching recently about a social worker – an older woman – and her struggles with the “system”.

Which could be a reflection of my current struggle with the system – trying to get extra benefits from my Disability, but having to first go through loops to try to get money owed me, which is not forthcoming, nor will be.

And yes, I’ve been somewhat stressed lately, and would love to just simplify things – I’m trying to sell the house to buy an apartment or go to assisted living, and that decision is also on my mind. I’d love to just sit back and have a blast from the past with an older video game from older, simpler times.

NOTES:

Setting: old family home, tardis-like interior, multiple rooms, private areas, cubicles

People: Dad (not present but his family place), group of kids/teens

Props:  Nintendo 64, flat screen tv, old 4 poster bed

Actions:  exploring, discovering, guiding kids, playing Nintendo

Feelings: familiarity, sense of history and family, security, need to pee

Snippets of thought: exploring new areas, remembering easier times, a safe place, inner rooms

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